Getting Uncomfortable

our woo newbie confronts crystals and crying

I couldn’t believe I had gotten myself into this. There I sat in the front row with a bag of crystals in my lap. Or at least I assumed they were crystals. We weren’t allowed to open them until the afternoon session on gemstone therapy. Queue the eye roll as I nervously turned the lumpy canvas bag over and over again in my hands. Was it too late to make a run for it?

My eyes momentarily darted toward the door and that was when she spotted me. Elizabeth was coming at me from across the room, arms open, to welcome me to her first Healers retreat, held on a freezing, blue-skied day in Minneapolis. I wasn’t going anywhere.

The invitation boasted of things like energy healing. Intention setting. Chakra balancing. Digestive well-being. Gemstone therapy. Guided meditation. Sound baths. A restorative menu. Wellness goodies.

Listen, I’m always down for some SWAG but I didn’t have high expectations for the healing “experiences.” If I could just survive a few hours of them I’d be on my way to a catered Ayurvedic lunch and afternoon sauna session.

Around a hundred people filled the space, and 30-minutes in two of them had already publicly shared emotional tell-alls that involved a lot of tears. Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than watching a stranger cry. I was squirming in my seat and starting to sweat, but I had promised myself that I’d try to keep an open mind. 

Nothing makes me more uncomfortable than watching a stranger cry.

As the day continued, I was still uncomfortable. I’m not going to pretend like that feeling ever went away entirely (well, maybe when I was stuffing my face with the decadent, astonishingly dairy-free chocolate dessert at lunch), but during each session, I would find myself nodding more than rolling my eyes. I’d find things to relate to. Experiences I shared. Connections I could make in my own life and in my own way. 

I also made friends. I met new people! I sprawled out on the floor up against strangers and listened to a “sound bath”. Part of me wanted to laugh out loud, and the other part of me couldn’t help but succumb to the deep, relaxing trance that it put me in. 

Maybe there was more to this whole “Healer” thing than I was willing to admit. 

Toward the end of the day we finally opened up those canvas bags full of rocks. My crystal was green, smooth, with flecks of peachy orange. The tag attached identified it as unakite. 

I left feeling more uncomfortable in my discomfort, if that makes sense. I wasn’t convinced that my chakras were balanced or that my energy had been healed, but I left feeling open to the idea that other people out there know things I don’t. That maybe there was more to this whole “Healer” thing than I was willing to admit. 

When I got home I set my Unakite on my desk, and googled the stone’s meaning: 

Unakite fosters healthy relationships through balanced emotions. It encourages harmonious partnerships, both in love and in business, and is especially helpful for working closely with a relative or friend where positive personal interactions are vital. As a professional support stone, Unakite helps increase business success in areas of beauty, aromatherapy, and fashion design.

A year later and this damn rock is still sitting on my desk. I can’t seem to let go of what it symbolizes for me. A day of feeling profoundly uncomfortable in a glorious way.

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